Life right now... well life is a big mess for me. And its not necessarily a bad mess, its just that my life is in general is messy. I have a lot of things going on in my life and I guess I can just be easily overwhelmed.
A few weeks ago was Bellwethers EP release, and I think that was probably around the last time I felt sane. The show itself was defiantly something that I needed. Nothing could ever make me feel like I'm not worthless the way playing music does. It always doesn't hurt to have the most incredible fan base a band could ask for. They come out and give their all no matter what. It really does mean the world to me. Without all you guys, I probably would of been a statistic for the Verrazano Bridge by now.
Big things are coming up for Bellwether too. I am not sure how much I am allowed to say, but we are getting out of state very soon, and fairly frequently.
I met a lovely girl recently. She is me with vagina. Loves music, loves Star Wars is terribly adorable. It just so happens that as soon as things were starting to build up momentum, I lose it. I just couldn't handle it. I don't know if its still too soon for me to get into anything serious, or if I am just so consumed by all thats going on recently that I just bailed like an asshole, but whatever I am having anxiety about, I hope it passes soon. I haven't spoke to her in about a day, and I am conscious of how shitty that is, especially because she is so sweet, but I think, at least for now, its best if I just keep to myself till I can get a grip on all this shit.
I have been acting rather reckless recently.
I did the Broadway Bomb last Saturday with James, Bob, Rob and Nick. It was truly one of the greatest experiences of my life. I have to say that there was something about the race that just made me feel whole. Perhaps its the liberating feeling of totally disregarding the law and risking your life competing to cross through red lights and not get annihilated between a bus and a taxi that I needed to reassure me that life isn't this completely dark and abysmal waste land that we occupy until we die.
Aside from the Bomb, there were a few instances of anonymous group sex that took place since my last post, which basically sums up my reckless behavior. Wild times.
I guess I really should get back to my papers. I can honestly say that I feel a little more calm and relaxed having wrote this.
Good job Andrew, good job.
